I love talking to people about all my experiences with falls and breaking bones. I don’t go skiing or ice skating anymore because I am a total clutz. I earned the nickname Grace in High School after falling into a planter, marching down the street (backwards to be fair to me) in a Veterans day parade. I fell smack dab in the middle of the street, into the dirt, with a white uniform on in front of thousands of people. It was probably more like 10 people but believe me…it felt like thousands! I was mortified! But I sprang up quickly upon my butt meeting the dirt. I felt a little like Tigger. Bounce. Bounce. Bounce. But I felt like a complete moron.
In fourth grade my girl scout troop went horse back riding. I am naturally competitive and decided that since my best friend, who had ridden horses for years, said she knew how to ride, I had to say the same thing. I had never ridden anything that wasn’t tied together in a circle. But…How hard could it be?! I mean, animals love me! I learned pretty quick as the horse took off on me and dragged me two miles, breaking both my upper arms and my foot. Lesson learned. When you don’t know how to do something, just say you don’t! Take a lesson from me and don’t be dumb.
When I lived in Hollywood, I broke my wrist ice skating on the set of ER. That’s right folks! The set of a medical TV show. Leave it to me! I remember falling backwards thinking, “Welp. I’m going to break either my wrist or my tail bone. If I lean a little more right, I’ll avoid what I’ve heard is the most painful bone in the body to break!”. Everyone came rushing to help me but again, I bounced up and ran to the bench. “I’m fine! I’m fine!” The nauseousness flooded over me and I looked down at my wrist, seeing it swell double in size. I couldn’t even sign my name to have them release me to get to the hospital! I was almost 100 percent certain I had broken it. And the tech concurred with me at the real ER. For that break, I would need surgery, a cast and external fixator, which would be required for 6 weeks. Not ideal for someone who depends on their looks to get work! Lol.
Then, after moving to CO, I was walking to get my mail on an icy day. I had never really known before what black ice is. Well, I know now! For the second time, I had to make the quick decision, wrist or tail bone. I chose the wrist. Again. I remember calling my boyfriend at the time and letting him know that I had just broken my wrist and was taking myself to the ER. I just knew. If you have ever broken a bone, you know that it is a pain that is unlike anything else.
And then 6 weeks ago? Six weeks ago, I went to put my car into my parents’ garage as mine has their car in it. I know, weird. Their garage is stubborn when it’s cold out and the outside keypad doesn’t work. So, I took my key and entered through the front door. I didn’t bother turning the lights on as I knew I would be going out through the garage. I walked at my normal, fast pace to the garage door and went to turn on the lights there, which are right above the staircase. Do I even need to tell you what happened next? You all know that with the nickname of Grace, I went down the stairs. I completely missed how close I was to the staircase took one too many steps and went tumbling down the stairs face first. Like literally tumbling like you see in the movies. I went into full on rotations until the wall stopped me! Two days later, I’d learn, my head went through the wall. I do remember a lot of stars and lights and when I had stopped falling, I laid there, crying and laughing at the same time, not quite comprehending what I’d just done. When I did finally move, the first thing I did was check to see if I had any teeth left. My face felt broken. I cried realizing that I was alone, no phone, no Apple Watch, no way to communicate that I was laying at the bottom of the stairs. It actually was a bit scary, I’m not gonna lie! At least my other falls were in public!
I dragged myself up off the floor and climbed up the stairs, feeling every part of my body. First thing I did was come back to my house to assess the damage. Which wasn’t ideal! I couldn’t stop the bleeding coming from my chin but figured that was normal with a fresh cut. I took a selfie, posted it on Facebook and prepared myself to sleep it off. I have good friends and that wasn’t going to happen. Within 20 minutes I was being dragged to the ER by my dramatic friends! I mean, it was just a cut! A band aid would have been just fine, and I felt stupid being in the ER. Eleven stiches later and four broken bones, one was the first rib and was grazing my Aorta, I realized, nobody was being a drama queen through this. The radiologist was so concerned they made me spend 2 nights in the hospital. Which I loved! They waited on me hand and foot and had awesome food! Well, what I could actually chew! Another bone I broke? My jaw. No. I didn’t have to have it wired shut. But I wanted it to be! Liquid diet and weight loss! Yippie! Turns out I didn’t need that done so I guess I’ll lose my Covid weight the old-fashioned way with diet and exercise! In total I broke four bones. My jaw, clavicle, top rib and…to my absolute horror…my nose.
All I could think when they told me about my nose was, “Is all the surgery, I’ve gone through in the past ruined? And will my nose now look like Marsha Brady’s after she was pegged with a football?” Even after I was told how lucky I was to be alive and that that I had to be very careful with that first rib break, I couldn’t help thinking about my nose. And if the rest of my face would be crooked. You guys…the swelling and bruising was awful! And I felt like my entire jaw was out of place. I’d try to bite down and my teeth wouldn’t match up. Six weeks later they still feel a little off but hopefully with time it will all match up again!
I had four different doctors I had to continue seeing when I was let out of the hospital and had to have contrast dye injected through my veins and arteries. It feels so incredibly weird and the radiologist warned me in advance it might feel like I was peeing my pants. It did feel like that and no…I didn’t really pee my pants. (I did check) And I was super warm! I kind of want it done daily when I have to go outside! Just kidding. It requires needles and I don’t like needles!
Six weeks of being very careful and not putting strain on the clavicle and rib, I finally received the pretty much all clear! I just can’t do planks for another four weeks. And that’s ok. It was a very frustrating 6 weeks where I had to give myself a lot of patience, realizing I could make things worse NOT listening to doctors orders. I was also really mad at myself for doing something so stupid. But now I’m just excited to be able to start doing some sort of working out. And I’m not walking outside while it’s slippery! Trust me, I know my body. So, you might see me at the studio working out now! And you may hear me whine while working out. But know, deep inside, I am loving being back and feeling very blessed that there wasn’t more damage to my body. I’m so happy to be alive and able to move my body fully again! I’m ready to do this! Are you? Come join me!