There is something that is so freeing when we stop apologizing and let our authentic selves shine! I have lived the life of trying to make everyone happy and like me! It’s exhausting! And it’s impossible. We all have different masks that we put on in life in different areas of our lives. I’m not going to act the same way I would around a 4 year old that I would around my adult friends. Although sometimes that is fun! But, learning who we are and embracing ourselves for all of it, good and bad, we can be proud and confident of who we are! We stop apologizing when someone tells us we speak too loud. We stop trying to change the fact that we talk a lot (of course we still need to know how to listen!). We love our bodies, our skin, our hair for what they are! We learn that foot in mouth syndrome is real! We know we have faults and of course we work on them. But once you begin to embrace the entirety of you, you find tribes that love you for those traits! It’s incredibly empowering and freeing! Friends might know that you tell it like it is and know that when they need honest, non sugar coated (but gently delivered) advice, you’re the person they are going to!
Start monitoring yourself. How many times do you apologize for something which literally doesn’t hurt or affect anyone but you? Like when you’re in a group exercise class and you find the instructor correcting you on your form… Do you say “sorry” or do you say “thank you”? I hear people say sorry for things like this quite often and if they say it around me or to me, I always say, “Why are you sorry? It’s my job to help you! No more apologizing!” I think it’s just become instinct in many situations. If we are being corrected, we feel imperfect and that we are disappointing someone. I’ve been in the world of correcting others for years now. Whether it’s teaching them how to sing, play the piano or workout, someone always apologizes when I’m just trying to make their life easier and you know…teach them! I mean, they are paying me to learn. Often we apologize just instinctively when people probably wouldn’t have noticed the mistake in the first place.
When I was singing professionally, at the beginning of my career, anytime I’d hit a note wrong, I’d laugh and shake my head. My dad noticed pretty fast and pointed it out to me that nobody would have noticed, even him, if I hadn’t have given it away. It took practice, but the first step in me being able to stop this behavior was to acknowledge it. Once I was aware, I began doing it less and less to the point I’d sometimes sing the same verse I’d just sung, laughing inside, no flincing! And guess what? Nobody cared! And if they did, they certainly didn’t say anything!
We are so hard on ourselves when we think we’ve made mistake or when we think we aren’t coming off perfect. In this process, we begin to loose ourselves and actually begin to forget who we are. And when we begin to loose ourselves that is when we begin to feel insecure, anxious, indecisive, unhappy and so much more!
How do you let go of all that learn again who you really are, and more importantly, love who you truly are? That takes work! It took me many years! But I have found myself recently working with more and more women in this area and it has been so much fun to watch how they blossom!
I have begun to incorporate a coaching service into my Pilates Plus business. I am working with girls and women from ages 12-1200 (you lose track of your age as you get older!) Each approach is different depending on the ages of gals I am working with. I believe that if you go into the teen years with the confidence of knowing who you are, life changes. Opportunities open up. This happens with every age as well!
I would love to work with you or someone you know who needs a boost in their life. Please contact me at 303-990-4246 to discuss rates and how I can help! Feel the freedom and wholeness of being Unapologetically U!